Just because....

Sigh
just because i have made mistakes
doesnt mean im worthless
just because life is difficult right now
doesnt mean it wont get better
just because things are hard
doesnt mean i cant learn something
just because we are apart now
doesnt mean we cant grow closer later

life is full of challenges, we canat control them, and will die trying. i have major control issues, i will be the first to admit that. I have nearly killed myself trying to fix my life to what i thought it would be. 2009 brought new mistakes, but also new knowledge.

I learned that my parents love me and do know what they are talking about
i learned that boys are trouble, and only a few really care about you
I learned that just because i screw up doesnt mean that im worthless
I learned that some people claim to be your friends, but arent
I learned that the friends who call you on your mistake, but stick by you despite are worth keeping
i learned that the real accepts those who care to OVER acheive, nott hose who procrastinate
I learned extra effort in an interview is well worth it
I learned that old friends stay friends even if the distance increases, they still care and reconnecting is fun.
I learned how to identify love from infatuation, and to seperate desire from needs
I learned to budget
I learned to fill out fancy paperwork
And finally i learned to be myself.....because no one else is going to do it

MAY I VENT? >:(

drama drama drama! why is it some people cant get enough? they complain about how much it makes their lives suck with the drama, but start MORE! why?! do you want to make my life miserable? to make it so i cant live down a mistake? i have apologized, and the affected parties have forgiven me, but you havent! why?
it doesnt even involve you! you claim to be such great friends with this person, but how can you be? you dont talk to anyone unless its someone you are sexaully involved with! WHy spoil my happiness?
you dont know me, dont judge me!

Dear Friend

I hope you understand. I miss you terribly, but i know in my heart that you would not want me to stop my life on your account. So even though my heart aches, and i feel terrible inside, i can't grieve yet. So for now i will hold it all inside. My heart is torn, and the tears are aching to flow. but i can't cry, not yet. my dear friend...i dont know what to do. but i know you want me to keep living. i pray for you, that on judgment day you will be allowed inside.
i cant cry yet. i hope you understand...
love,
Me

Empty

Well today really sucked
but i dont feel anything
i should be crying my eyes out
yet they are dry
I pray for your soul
hoping God's grace will grant it's blessings
so that when the pearly gates open
i can ask you
why?
was it something i did
or something i didnt do?
was life truely unbvearable for you?
I am going to miss you
Rest in the peace you longed to find

i am too sad to tell you

i dont know whats going on
but i feel so empty
so alone
but im surrounded by people
i dont know whats going on
its snowing outside
i should be happy
but hot wet tears stream down my face
i feel sick inside
if i could only name this feeling
maybe you could help me
before its too late
it doesnt take much to make me cry
and its hard to make me smile

Dear God...

hmmm
i dont know what to think
about anything right now
i dont want to
i want to listen to my breathing as it grows even
feel the muscles in my body relax
i want to stare into the distance
and feel my eyes become unfocused
i dont want to feel
i just want to be dormant
nonexistant for awhile
not forever
just for a little bit
i want the pain to go away
the headachs, heartaches and tension
i want to forget the past present and future
i dont understand anything
i dont want to anymore
but im tired of hurting
for no reason at all
tired of a deep sinking feeling in my heart
that pulls me down farther everyday
i dont know whats going on
i pray everynight that you will help me through this
but nothing happens
what am i doing wrong?
i think i have lost site of you Lord....
i dont know how to find you again
always i go in this circle of disobedience..
i dont want it to keep going
i find you, then forget you
find, then forget
and forget.
im tired of hurting....
please carry me through this new chapter
for i dont know how to live it
guide my choices
choose my words
i surrender myself, my mind, and my soul to you Lord.
I want to live my life the way you want me to
please be there to help me through
Amen

Doors hate me

so in the last two days i have shut the same hand in about seven different things....resulting in an injured finger

1. shut it in the front door, causint the initial injury. my finger turned purple, bled under the nail, and needed to be immobilized for comfort.
2. mom accidently shut my hand in the car door, besides a tiny mark by my pinky knuckel, there is nothing to show for it
3. shut my hand i my desk drawer, finger began to go numb
4. shut my hand in my friends car door
5. shut my hand in my bathroom door
6. shut my hand in my doo, finger began to bleed again, tip is completely funny shaped..pretty sure its broken.. it hurts really bed
7. shut my finger in (drum roll please) the door to the food court!

As a result my middle finger on my left hand is bruised purple and white (dont ask me how i got white bruises i didnt know they were pssible until now) the tip is completely immobile and swollen, the nail may come off soon, and even to i have immoilized my finger i have a pretty good feeling that its broken. i also have a small bruise that is hardly noticable on my pinky knuckle, and despite being a little sore the rest of my hand is no worse for wear.

In conclusion. doors really hate me!

Deck the halls with bottles of pills-i need them extra strength ones

Holiday decorating can be the most insane part of my household. BUt at the same time i adore almost every minute of it. When we come together to decorate the tree, adding some extraodrinary bits and pieces that lead ot older memories and fond times, i cant help but smile and relax. Sure there are times when i am very stressed and want to tear my hair out by the roots. BUt without those times i cant appreciate the times when we work together as a family.

I love my family, they helped make me who i am...no i dont love everything that happens involving my family. i dont love the mess and chaos we have sometimes. no i dont adore dirty diapers and potty training. I dont adore incessant chatter all the time, even though i am the one who starts it all.

Families and holidays are the same. stressful at times, but you dont remember much of that later on.

The Chaos that is my Home

thanksgiving is a time when all of us should count our blessings and be thankful we have what we do. And i am. In our household i find that the people who live here bring me comfort and joy....most of the time. I consider myself to be a very stoing person. I can bottle almost anything you throw at me with out a hint of emotion. BUt when someone who you have tried to love dearly, tried to help, tried to love and care about, tried to be a sister to, tells you that they never want you to come back, it hurts. I am still astounded at my reaction to this remark. You can tell me to my face that i am the ugliest most selfish person that you have never known, an di can shoulder it. but for some reason this biting response tore into my heart.

I dont know if i can love her anymore. I cant love someone who doesnt love me, or care for me, or even herself. I want with all my might to be close to her, but every time i try to, every time i try to help her, she pushes me away and blames me for the lack of effort in our relationship. I have idolized my sister for most of my life, it wasnt until just recently that i realized i should not idolize her. She would only hold me back if i modeled myself against her. I loved her dearly.

Now though. its different. After she looked me in the eye and said to my face that i should not come back for christmas, something died. a shred of hoep i guess. that maybe someday should would get over whatever was holding her back from getting close to me, and we could be sisters like we used to be. Friendly, open, close, with no resentment.

I wish i could feel the saem way about her as i did before, and maybe this is just anger and disappointment getting to me. i hope thats all it is. because i want to love my sister. but right now i cant stand her

Am i doing this right?

today has been one of the first days i have been home in about three months. While being home i wonder what changed about me. I come home and i find myself more patient but also less so. I can tolerate more of certain things and less of others. I love my family more deeply, but i can see the chaos i refused to acknowledge before.

It makes me wonder...i screwed up alot the first month of college. I made alot of mistakes, had alot done wrong to me, had a lot of drama. but at the saem time i dont want to erase that. i can't ignore what i did, but i can learn from it. But am i doing what's right for me?

am i living life correctly? being the student, sister, friend and daughter i should be? I disappoint so many..it jus makes me wonder if maybe somewhere i am doing something right.

i am blessed with two wonderful parents who have stuck by my side even when i was doing everything wrong. when i was being a self absorbed brat. and i hope and pray everyday that i can do something to make them proud. To show them they didnt screw up by having me.

Apparently something has changed. since i have been in college i hardly ever wear makeup, and i dont obsess about what i am wearing the same way i used to. and people still love me despite the flaws in me that are so plain. Maybe mom and dad were right, despite my selfish attention seeking ways, and my poor complexion, there is something that i am doing right. and no amount of primping can change that.

College has been one of the best experiences of my life, but also one of the worst. living on your own shows how strong your moral standings are and how strong you actually are. I have seen my failings...and im not proud of them, but they made me stronger and more resilient to my insistent urge to please. some people dont deserve to be in my life, no matter what they do to try and force themselves into it

My life is just beginning, but at the same time i feel like its ending, at least a chapter of it. i can no longer be the little girl in ribbons and curls, and must evolve into a mature young woman who can take care of herself and others. i dont know if i am doing this right....

no one ever told me how to live my life, they just put suggestions into the suggestions box. it's my responsibilty to check them.

Let me praise my daddy for a minute, because people dont do that often enough. My dad has been with me all of my life, and has always been my idol. these past few months have been easier because i looked forward to chatting with my daddy. he is an amazing man. he has stood by me despite my short comings, he has pushed me to reach for success becaus ei can reach it no matter what. My dad is my hero. He has been so strong despite what life has thrown at him. Even now, when he cant walk unassisted for long periods of time he still puts other first. i love my daddy. and i want to thank him for pushing me to get over my mistakes and to rise above those who dont deserve my time. he taught me the most important things, how to laugh, how to succeed, how to love unconditionally. i love you dad

My mom is amazing too. she has helped me with things dad couldnt...you know those girly things. boy trouble, depression, anger and hormones. she was the one i would turn to when i fought with dad, or when i didnt understand the situation. Mom taught me how to be myself. I am beautiful creative and outgoing, i have a beautiful voice and can do anything i put my mind to, i am a social butterfly. just like mom. My mom has been the epitome of what i would like to be since i was little. despite what my parents say, at times i want nothing more but to be a stay at home mother. those memories of cooking together, laughin talking and just sitting near each other warm my heart and make me wish i can be half the mother my mom is. i love oyu mom

-to both of my parents

you have taught me so much about life and love. i cant repay you. i only hope that as i spread my wings, that you will continue to catch me when i fall. that no matter how bad i screw up, you will still love me the same way you do now. I hope i dont disappoint you too much...and that i can become the woman you pruned me to be. I cant ever repay you for giving me life and teaching me the important things....but i hope i can turn out how you want me to. I love you both so much. daddy, thanks for giving me your eyes, i love them, and i love how they remind me of how alike we are in appearance. its a special bond only i have with you.. Mom, everytime i put a pencil to paper i think of you and how alike we are in personality. despite all the fights we had, all the threats and hateful words, you still love me. thank you. you both are my world. if i lost either of you i dont think i could continue on. i love you so much!

Your daughter

Stupid Me

i fell again
fell really hard
what was i thinking?
i guess i wasnt
why do i get so attached?
when they barely know i am there?
i guess i am a hopeless romantic.,,
but this wont matter in a year
so i will pretend i dont hurt
and go on with my life
until i forget about it
but for now
let me cry
let me heal
if i dont, it will only get worse
let me be upset
let me be a little sad
and then i can go on with life
and find happiness again

MORE FRIEND PICTURES!

this is Deandre.....i love this picture so much, its such a nice one of him! <3






this is Sarah(the blonde) and Alysha(the short red head) my two best girlfriends!





this is a better picture of kyle, hes pretty cool
CRYsTAL! here is a much better picture of her!

HELP!

Lost in my own world
as the paint mixes
i hold the brush
but its more like an extension of my being
without it i am not whole
as the brush touches the paper i breathe harder
my pupils dialate
i lose all sense of time
all sense of being
i cant remember my own name
i cant hear anything but my own thoughts
i dont even think
i just do
am i crazy?
is this normal?
i dont want to stop
the brush continues to swirl over the paper
i take a deep breath and step back

Random pictures of me and my bff Garret fake fighting

Wishing you were somehow here again

Sigh
Life can be very frustrating
But when you have loved ones there
Or rather almost there
It makes it bearable
I miss home alot
But there is something in the air
Maybe i am growing up
But home is not quite what it used to be
Wheni think about it
I think about leaving again
Maybe thats because though it is home
I know it wont be permanent

COLLEGE BUDDIES!

This is Kyle....he is my Bff Garret's suite mate and a pretty awesome guy



This is not the best picture, but this is Crystal



This is GARRET! HA HA my BFF
The long awaited friend list!

Some random thoughts about college life

51 things you would never think about before you go to college

1. You are actually moving away!
2. You have more space than you may think in the dorms
3. your roommate is not an evil villaness out to get you!
4. Shampoo works well as a body wash and a shaving cream
5. an all purpose cleaner keeps nastiness away
6. college furniture will eventually tip over and cause you pain.
7. Teachers dont bug you about homework
8. Attendance is not mandatory biut you are paying them so you might as well get your money's worth
9. College boys are no different than high schoolers.
10. Apparently hanging underwear in a tree outside gets them whiter
11. if you odnt have a trash can, just through it off the balcony onto my head please!
12. learn what you can about real life....being naiive opens doors that will allow you to be taken advantage of
13. Nerf guns can cause you more pain than you realize. split lips are a common side effect
14. Phones exist for a reason, dont be afraid to use them
15. DO YOUR HOMEWORK! if you fail you no longer have college as an option for that year...or possibly any other year
16. JObs are hardx to find, apply as early as possible
17. Money is scarce, do not, i repeat, do not take more than you need if you have to spend some
18. You are an adult now, real mistakes=real consequences
19. head phones become a neccessity if you want to get any sleep
20. Condoms are not rare around here. take a deep breath and get over it. unless you want to pick it up and through it away its going to be there a while.
21. no one cares about what you look like here
22. You can go to class in your pjs
23. You get really good exercise
24. Bikes would be a huge benefit
25. Watch out who you hang with, if you put yourself in a certain situation by yourself, its one hundred times harder to get out of it
26. Six hour saturday classes can be sheer torture
27. EAT RIGHT!
28.get lots of sleep, who knows when you are going to have to stay up and get some extra homework done.
29. Caffiene and coffee are your two new best friends
30. and something sweet
31. if you wander aorund long enough, its likely you can find something to do on campus
32. Or find free food
33. Sorities and Fraternities are often over rated. A lot of drama revolves around them. if you arent mature enough to handle it, dont join
34. Homesickness is a definite issue. you cant get rid of it, and its ok to cry once in a while. as long as no one is watching
35. You will haav elots of free time, find something constructive to do with it. after homework that is
36. Take little breaks when doing your homework, it improves focus and helps prevent homework over load.
37. Test programs can and will crash your computer
38. Boys are yucky....most of the time. dont swoon for the first cute one who tells you that you are gorgeous. if you make him work for it, he will respect you more.
39. Boys are not a neccessity, you can live with out them
40. College is over rated half of the time, others it is under rated.
41. Sometimes paying a little extra for housing would probably be better
42. Suite mates who have no courtesy are very common
43. COllege kids will steal anything that isnt nailed down
44. Activity hours for college kids start at about 5 at night until about five in the morning
45. That is, non-campus functions
46. People will respect your values, you dont have to drink
47. Or smoke
48. and you definitely dont need to do drugs
49. Febreeze is a good thing
50. its ok to wear clothes more than once
51. DOnt take advantage of anyone, you will feel terrible


whether or not these apply to you personally is not the question, these are concepts i have derived from my own observations.

The truth hurts, but a lie can hurt more.

PArt of life is making mistakes and learning to live with the consequences. Unfortunately no one ever tells you exactly how much it will hurt when you hurt someone you care about. Someone who was always there for you, someone you took for granted. And sadly the worst part is when they are finally fed up with you and just pull themselves out of your life, leaving a big gaping hole that leaves you feeling like the world's biggest jerk and loser.

If i could do it over, i would have been completely and totally honest. For some reason i decided to lie about something stupid, and it did more damage then telling the truth would have. Now i get to pick up the few pieces i have left of one of my best friendships and cry over my loss. I can't fix it, cuz i was the one who made the intial mistake. No matter how much i apologize she just doesnt want me in her life anymore. Maybe its better this way. maybe now she can get on with her life with out me there to continually complicate it and make her look like a fool.

But i still hurt. The pain is still frsh, and tinged with the terrible ache of regret. This is one mistake i wish i didnt have the opportunity to learn from. I close my eyes and try to distract myself from my thoughts on the matter, but it doesnt work. I cry every night at this loss, realizing now too late what i was risking.

Bitterness from her cuts more than i ever thought it could. I was a terrible friend. I cant fix it...i cant make it better, i cant even apologize because her eyes glaze over when she "sees" me. I didnt think it could hurt this much....but at the same time i deserve it. i was horrible to her, if i had been even a fourth of the friend to her as she was to me.....maybe i would sstill be able to call her my friend.

You only get one chance at life, and i have made my share of mistakes, some worse than others.....some completely changed the course of my life....others hurt enough to make me want to fall asleep and never wake up....i dont know what to do....i am sinking back in this hole i barely got out of. I can feel her pain....and knowing i was the cause of it makes it worse.

Faith like Purple Potatoes

I have survived the first month of college, but not without my ups and downs and some scars and regrets. These days its so easy to get caught up in the hype of "what i want to do" rather than thinking "wht i need to do" . This past month has been full of mistakes and regrets for me. Luckily i have some good friends that cared enough about me to call me on my crap and give me a wake up call.

To be exact i got caught up in a life that i often condemned others for. I wanted to be wanted i guess is the proper term. so i compromised my values to become a person they would want to be around. thanks to some divine intervention from one of my best friends i was able to wake up and realize that i didnt want to be on the road i was starting to head off on in a few months. Shoot i didnt want to be on it then. i didnt think about how my choices would affect my future, and once it was pointed out, i saw i was headed in the opposite direction of where i wanted to be.

So hopefully with the help of my close friends who cared enough to go, "knock it off" i will be able to truely be myself and break away from my people pleaser habits.

On a lighter note the friends that have been worth my time and who have stuck around despite my evil ways are now closer to my heart then ever. I am having a blast with college life and doing random things just because i can. Like running through a sprinkler, or balancing on a six foot ledge and falling back on the grass that grows in about two places on campus.
Found a church i really like here, has a lot of qualities i looked for. This past month has shown me that no matter how strong you think you are, or how independent you think you can be, its just the opposite. Those who are the strongest still will fall short, those who need no one wil find themselves utterly alone and helpless. Thats why we need a loving and forgiving God who will always be there to help us up when we fall off the path.

I am finally learning what it means to be an adult. I dont know how great of an adult i will be, i know i am far from perfect and often screw up and go on with my life without thinking. I have a lot of regrets. But i am going to do my best to become my vision of what i want to be when i grow up. That wonderful amazing flawless vision of this wonderful caring artist that i have had in my head since i was about 6 years old. I know i will never be her. but having that goal will help me to stay focused and allow me to ignore all of the distractions down here.
God has a plan for me, and i want to be ready to fulfill that role when he calls. I am in a hard situation right now, about 10-12 hours from home, truely independent for the first time of my life, and also surrounded by people i didnt think would say word one to me. But i know if i have faith that eventually God will show me what my purpose in this life is, i know i can be a godly woman. The woman i have always wanted to be.

Here are som epictures of what i have been doing this past month, i wil have a post with more pictures soon, but i really wanted to update my blog.

WEEK ONE!

this is going to be mostly pictures of life this past week, my first full week at school. in this past week i have been thru the mill, missing family, being creeped out by weird college kids, gettting burnt and so on. hopefully the pictures will tell it better than me.


this pic is my feet after the first day of walking around on campus, the baby toe is bruised, and i ended up breaking it later on in the week. its taped now, and they said its safe to walk on, so i will live.






this is a would be picture if the farmers tan on the back of my neck, which is now about 7 shades darker than the rest of my body. however i am getting tan legs and arms, and i have a funny tan line on my feet where my flip flops sit!




the picture below is my first chalkboard mural, which iam going to update every week. i have waay too much time on my hands i think

so this is it for now, when i can think in a more efficient way i will be more detailed...lol

The Big Apple Adventure

Or

Small Town Girl Goes To The Big Scary Place

New York, if I had to sum it up in one word, is breathtaking. LITERALLY!

But I am getting ahead of myself.

This trip had so many firsts for me. At first, I was nervous with new plane security; I was constantly worried that something would get confiscated or that I would be dragged into that tiny room of doom! Packing was a nightmare; I had to fit enough clothes for a week with extra souvenir room into two small bags, both carry on. Dad tried to stow away but he pulled my clothes out in the process so that didn’t work. LOL.

I woke at 3 in the morning though I didn’t have to be at my ride's house until 9:00. I curled my hair after double checking my suitcases. I was terribly nervous! The ride to the airport was fun, but my stomach was bunched up in knots as I prepared myself for security and the actual plane ride. Being reassured by my friends that it was completely safe and not as big of a hassle as it was made out to be, I went through security without a hitch; though a few of my friends were pulled out to repack their toiletries.

Then I got on the plane.


I was lucky enough to be seated by a good friend who had flown before. He talked to me the entire time and laughed with me at my surprise when I felt jolts of turbulence. However I was ready to be done with planes when we flew from Dallas to Newark NJ. It was one in the morning NY time when we landed and got to the hotel. But it was only 11pm at home. Being on a plane for 3 hours one time and 3 hours another with long waits between transfers is not fun. But I enjoyed the experience the first time.

Tuesday morning. we headed into NYC for the first time. After driving through the already busy traffic, waiting 2 hours through a supposedly 15 minute drive, we got off the bus to walk through the city to experience the full effect. The smell was disgusting! It smelled like old fish and dirty sewers. Not even 5 minutes after we left the bus a man came begging for money. The buildings were so tall! I hurt my neck from looking up so much! We headed out for a tour of the town! we visited St. Patrick’s cathedral, times square, Chrysler building, the apple store, Rockefeller center, and my favorite of the day, THE GUGENHEIM! da da da duh!

ST. Patrick’s cathedral was truly beautiful. the stained glass, the pews. My
favorite part was their enormous organ set up on a balcony in the back. It was at least half the height of the cathedral! The statues and the candles every where made for a beautiful set up. After that I saw a steaming sewer...yes they really do steam. And the vents that are every where in the movies smell like a bathroom that hasn’t been cleaned. We also saw Trump Tower, which was really cool. They have a doorman in the front dressed up all nice.

Now I am a little sore about Rockefeller center, as we walked by I tripped and twisted my ankle. which sucked. I thought the center was a lot bigger than it was, but then again when they fill it with ice in the winter, it has less people in it. or rather less tents. The rest of the buildings (excluding the Guggenheim) we visited were nice, but dimmed in comparison to the Guggenheim!

The Guggenheim is one of the best art museums ever. I saw my first van Gogh and Picasso there! However I was a little disappointed with the permanent exhibits. The architecture sketches were cool, but they all looked the same to me. And finishing the long walk to find sixth grader art at the top was a little irritating. though it is a lot better than art I made in sixth grade.
We took a short break for shopping and a little exploration before dinner. It rained for the first time after that. And it poured! I was drenched before 5 minutes were up. And as quickly as it started, it did not let up! We had the BEST pizza I have ever eaten in NY. These slices were huge! after eating half, it was still as big as a normal paper plate!

After that we headed back to the hotel for some social time and relaxation.

Wednesday! well I got up to prepare myself for one of the highlights of the trip.....PHANTOM OF THE OPERA! We weren’t going to the show until 8...but we were exploring the town all day so unless we wanted to change on the bus we had to get ready in the morning. I wore a blue dress given to me for the occasion. Because it is windy in new York I was wise enough to bring shorts to wear under it. No peeping toms for me! But as we headed to central park for some exploration...I made the mistake of standing on a vent, which blows air as a subway goes by! Needless to say I did a pretty good impersonation of Marilyn Monroe.....I was not happy.. We had picked up a professional tour guide who took us by the apartment building where John Lennon was killed, and his memorial in central park.
We went to the fountain where enchanted was filmed, and met a really cool sax player. who played New York New York for us, and invited me and a few friends to join him in a kick line! Afterward I got to meet Hans Christian Andersen! or rather a statue of him. My mom says we are very likely related so I was tickled. Especially since he wrote one of my favorite stories, The Little Mermaid. I was a little annoyed at first though, because there were a bunch of obnoxious children climbing on the statue, insulting us tourists.

The next thing we saw was a sculpture that had been recovered out of one of the twin towers after nine eleven. It was beaten and bruised and terribly damaged. but it was truly powerful with the message it conveyed.


One of the things about New York is that you never know who you are going to meet! As we walked down wall street a person dressed up in a panda costume walked around, asking for money with its heavily embellished pink sequin purse. As we left Wall Street we headed for the NYC public library. The carving inside was spectacular! The library itself was a work of art! We headed for ground zero next, which looked nothing like the rubble we all picture it as. It is now a busy booming construction site!

After lunch we were given time to explore Times Square and do some souvenir shopping.
Times Square was amazing, there were buildings so covered in light up bill boards that it appeared to be nothing more than that! It was still raining too. At eight o' clock we headed to the Broadway theater. Luckily my teacher had gotten tickets in advance, or we may not have gotten in the line was so long! The musical was amazing! This being my first professional show I was flabbergasted! My only complaint was a couple of sound errors. but that could happen to anyone and they performed admirably besides! I got my t-shirt and went to bed too keyed up to sleep.

Thursday-our last full day in NY, we visited Ellis Island and the statue of liberty! Ellis island was cool but the statue of liberty was better! However I thought she would be bigger than she was. But it's still cool. Then we visited the MOMA or MOdern Museum of Art. It was really cool...but not a lot of classic there. Saw some really disturbing art. We were so wiped out by that time a lot of people crashed (including me) during a brief break we took at the front. I saw Jackson Pollock, Andy Warhol, Rauschenberg , and Chuck Close...all of which are my heroes! Later we explored China town and Little Italy. both of which were so cool! The first thing I saw in China town was a window full of roasted ducks, which all still had there heads on them.

Later we visited the Empire State Building...but only went to the 86th floor, mostly because we would get a better view. I was not terrified like I thought I would be! The view was truly breath taking! Me and some friends goofed off while we waited for our group to come together. Got some funny pictures.

Friday- our final day. We had until 2:00 pm to explore the Metropolitan Museum of Art, and in those six hours I had I barely scratched the surface! I saw Dali, van Gogh, Rembrandt, O’Keeffe, Pollock, Chagall, Monet, Manet, and so many others! I was truly geeking out! I was so excited I couldn’t contain myself. I made a guard nervous, I was just trying to get a good look at one of my favorites, van Gogh ’s corn field, and she asked me to back away. All I could do was sober up and be a civilized viewer. I think I resembled a fan girl beforehand. I saw samurai armor and famous sculptures. I saw the stained glass window from Ferris Bueller's day off, and the painting where Cameron zooms in. Making the Chicago setting inaccurate. At lunch I had my first NYC hot dog. which tasted so delicious!
I had a hard time believing it was a hot dog. We left to board the plane that would take us home. But a Swiss army knife delayed us as a passenger from the last flight had left it on. We waited 2hours for a storm, then another for the knife. Didn’t get home until five in the morning, but I had so much fun it was well worth it.







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I am attending NMSU this fall with an honor's scholarship. I will be majoring in art and education. My father, who edited this post, sincerely hopes I learn to use the shift key before my freshman comp professor flunks me.

You can see all 1,188 pictures I took in NYC HERE.