after last night i have been a thoughful state of mind. im not sure what brought it about. maybe being so honest with myself made me start to think about how i have been thinking, my patterns and the way i have been thinking the last few months.
something i have noiced is it has been all about me. literally. until about last week when i started talking to mom about how to be a better sibling, daughter and girlfriend, i was a selfish little bit**. i didnt think about anyone else but me. i still struggle with it alot of the time. im trying to learn to be more patient and not to parent my younger siblings. its really hard not to becase mr i has developed this new habit where i tell him he needs to calm down or something and he says make me...irks me to death. i think i might be doing better but im not sure. i have been keeping my hands to myself.....biting my tongue instead of smarting off all the time. trying to think about how i would feel on their side if it was me.
i am not perfect i have a lot of work to do. its an ongoing process i guess.